My first Birdcage Threesome 

Wicked thoughts scurrying thy mind? I assure you of nothing scandalous, I plan on keeping this post PG rated for my younger followers (though I assure you some of them could teach you and I a thing or two.)

Happy to be back in Mumbai once again and excited to know I’m meeting guests who I haven’t seen in over a few years. It’s funny how being left to host the evening the place falls upon my choosing every now and then. Well when suggested the dining option many of them chuckled knowing only I could have thought of something so – exciting. 

I wait patiently at Cafe Threesome in Versova. The vibe is fabulous. The DJ spinning some deep house tunes and the service of the barman prompt to keep my spirits ‘high’. It’s a very chic sublime concept of a restobar with a unique twist to a much enticed exotic menu. The bathroom catches my fancy given the soap dispenser being a Jack Daniel bottle with a selfie booth (I’m sure it’s seen some mayhem and action three ways to Sunday in its time) with the lovely folk visiting for a powder pucker. 

It’s always great meeting old friends. So much catching up to do well in this case thanks to a multitude of Whatsapp chats were in touch though far away and life carried on. A gentle reminiscence of ‘wild days gone past’ and a somber melancholy sets in to a time not so long ago that is hard to come by these days. Thank god for change and the stagnation of us all to pick up where we left off unfettered. A few of the usual lot couldn’t make it and their presence was missed. But we were at Cafe Threesome and I had heard a lot about some of the wild preparations. 

Now before the morale police come to task let me assure you after being in the food fraternity a while and travelled far and wide there’s not much that shocks me anymore. But a good preparation or the culinary skill and concept of chefs these days could arouse much curiosity to ensure I am left gasping for more. Yes, there is a hashtag circulating these days to the effect #foodporn and yes I totally understand why. After all good food = porn these days? 

Let’s call ourselves back to the showcase at hand. I am gently ushered aside to allow me to let go of the menu to the chefs imagination and only asked my preference being vegetarian or not. I go for the non vegetarian route this time. Having detoxed myself in Goa I feel alive and fresh for more. Sadistic much? Read on. 

The Italian Chicken makes its way like a caged animal to our table. For a moment, in the dim lit ambience I thought we would have a live chicken up for slaughter given the cage that accompanied it. There is a restaurant in Mexico that does that I’m told. Don’t want to divulge more details here but as I said things are bizarre in the world of food excitement these days. Fresh from the farm onto the table in a matter of speaking – literally! 

On the lighter side, what did chicken say to server upon arriving at my table? Cage meeeeeee. (I’m not known for my jokes. Thank god for small mercies.) 

 The Italian Chicken   Pic courtesy: Nolan Mascarenhas Photography

Our up and about waiter with a hop to his step further elucidates; ‘Sir. This dish is an Italian flavoured burger patty with salad leaves, Roma tomatoes, pickled cucumber with a serving of grilled onion chutney, jalapeños & salsa served with thousand island dressings and fries.’  The waiter had me at pickled cucumber. The rest was just the icing and a orgasmic blur emitted from his iteration of the condiments. I smiled in glee thanking him like a satiated kid in a consumed candy shop. 

The meat was tender and well marinated. Perfect char and succulent and juicy inside. The fries fresh and crispy. The presentation reminded me of Mr Williams character in the movie the Birdcage. The cage round and red made of firm wrought iron was produced and kept aside. Ladies this piece of jewellery could do well to husbands who don’t behave themselves on the dinner table or elsewhere- if you catch my drift. Come now, your probably thinking 50 shades darker yes? 

While your at this place do dig into a few exotics such as the Silken mutton galauti and the wasabi fish fingers. One of my recommendations for the vegetarians is the cute Cupcake Shrooms. Now it’s not illegal so your safe. More on my Instagram post shortly about that in the coming week. Stay tuned. 

All in all I better let your mind play havoc and run a little wild. The next time in the mood for roll cage might I suggest some with a threesome. Guaranteed to excite. 

Gardening @ the bar 

I must confess. I miss my garden. The smell of wet mud, the plucking of weeds and my entire gardening apparel, gloves, hat et all. The simple joys of pottering and tottering around getting my hands dirty (in a matter of speaking). 

On my food trail in lovely Mumbai on a glorious sweaty and sunny afternoon a foodie bestie and self decided to head over to Jamjar diner @ Versova for some much needed catch up and a ‘special surprise’ that awaited me. 

Least expecting come dessert time was the presentation of this ‘sinful surprise’ brought to our table- Flower pot surprise. 

I guess it must have been the constant high pitched tone shrills me and my bestie kept on at that possible caught the attention of our garçon attending to us to attentively without ask hand over this delicate creation. 

So what is the Flower Pot Surprise? As you can see it looks like an orchid plant but underneath the so called deceiving earthly mud is a ton of gooey brownies, a few diced marshmallows infused with dollops of vanilla ice cream topped off with Oreo soil. A gardeners treat indeed. 

Mind you though, looks can be deceiving. Though small in size it took all our might to down this treat. It is comfortable enough to satiate at least 3 people on the table so order one carefully.

With great tunes belted out in a very chic retro diner (loved the old juke box) and great conversation ahead here’s to happy food trails ahead. Oh- I forget to mention – don’t worry if you don’t have green fingers for this any color will do as long as the sweet tooth craving prevails. 

Flower pot surprise -(before & after)   Pic courtesy – Nolan Mascarenhas Photography